Are y'all ready for your headliner of the night?

[Cheering and applause] Jesus, voice-over: Do you get nervous at all?

Vanessa, voice-over: I get nervous, but it's almost like the nerves almost give you that, like, fire.

Man: You've seen her on HBO.

You've seen her on Comedy Central.

Vanessa: As soon as it's go time... Man: Vanessa... Vanessa: the light hits, they call your name, you kind of have to jump off the cliff.

Gonzalez!

Vanessa: Let's go!

[Cheering and applause] What up?

¿Qué onda, Laredo?

¡Puro 956!

Yeah.

I love being back home.

It's crazy to me.

Jesus was asking me-- he was, like, "You're not nervous any exes are gonna come?"

And I said, "I don't have any exes "in Laredo, thank God.

"Everybody I know that has an ex in Laredo also has restraining orders."

Están psychos aquí.

My dad was a canine officer at Customs... [Cheering and applause] and I would ask my mom, "Mom, Mom, what bridge is Dad working at tonight?

No, no.

I just want to send him prayers."

Que pesque muchas drogas.

Sí.

And she would be like, "Oh, Bridge Two."

And I'd be like... " Órale, Vicki, Bridge One."

[Laughter] And every weekend, we would go across.

♪ Mesa, mesa ♪ ♪ Mesa que más aplauda, mesa que más aplauda ♪ ♪ Za, za, za, y a tu za, y a tu za ♪ [Cheering and applause] Yeah, 15 years old.

Con las falditas.

... all out, ready to get abducted... [Laughter] but even the cartel was like... "No, esas no".

[Laughter]